I am the girl who is always ignored.
People amaze me. I always believed that each person lives seeing a different view of the same world I am looking at.
I always wondered how it would feel to be them or, if by any chance, if they were thinking about how another goes about existing.
So, I try to be part of their world if only to understand my life, this life, thru their experience. I gained friends who I loved and adored. Not only because they are skilled and talented but because they are all nice and they would make a wonderful member of my made up family of acquaintances.
And then I grew up and fell in love. The kind of love you vow into “from now throughout a lifetime”. So, I do everything to keep them with me. To keep them, him mine.
But then after all the caring, the “how are you” texts, the hellos, and thousands of failed attempts for a date or a reunion, I became the friend, the ex lover, the acquaintance they ignore.
It is as if my presence never mattered that they don’t mind me waiting at all. Waiting for their replies, their time, them loving me back.
I am the girl who is always ignored. The girl whose messages are always just seen.
I am the girl who hurts. All the time. But who cares? No one does. And one day, I will be growing tired. And one day, they will be my used to be friends who I will also ignore. Not because I turned bad, but because I will get used to being ignored I could forget they even existed.